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with a soft sprinkle of lust
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sixteen and i mature every 1310. bubbly and cheerful in the outside, broken and shattered in the inside. i have the greatest ooofve girlfriends, a lovely soul sister&darling, and a wonderful daddie whose been there with me thru the ups and downs. |
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Tuesday, June 17, 20089:35 AM
how i wish my parents will read this, so that they'll understand ; i want my freedom la! heh. i think i do. eh, wait.. I DO. i want to do stuffs i want to. i know i'm still young, & like, u are my parents, u have the rights to control me, BLABLABLA. but, u must let me do my own mistakes. thats only when i will learn. hahs. && like, why cant u guys just let me lead it? i lead, u support. i fail, u help. i succeed, u smile. doesnt make sense. ah, who cares. but hey! let me do things i want to do,please. i'm growing up. i'm maturing. i can think 4 myself. i can decide 4 myself. i know what is right & wrong. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH~ but but but. i still love my parents. (: they are the best, i think. they were there when i they were the ones whom i trust. & my SISTERS are always there to give words of wisdom like ; oh, you are so manja. abah always give u whatever u want. abah always bela u. & have u ever thought about what they've gone thru because of u? no right! you make it so easy to fall out of love.- oh puh-lease. i know i'm just a bug to u. always bugging your life, making life harder. i know la you're so oh-so-perfect in mama & abah's eyes, &i'm not. that is pretty much why i always go out. hoping others can cheer me up. oh wait. they always do. home is like suppose to be heavenly & stuffs. but this home is always quiet due to ; no peeps talking. eh, they do. but not to me, & what? you say i'm the one who doesnt join? i tried, but seems to be awkward. like you guys dont talk to me. sometimes only u will. & its like as if you dont want me there. i know la i'm different. as in really different. u guys are like, goodie2 peeps. & i'm like, a spoiled brat. okay. if one of my family members read this, take note okay; i still love u guys no matter what. but i hate this life. i hate being controlled. its the best? ah, i dont think so. at least i know my limits. read, & understand. great. u guys are the best. pfffft. & i hate the way u siblings look at me, like i'm a nobody. like i'm nothing. funny thing is, sometimes i hope that my abg will understand me. HA-HA. funny rite? sometimes he even put a false front to me. trying to bongkar rahsie kan? cause i'm so open to u. heh! everything also i tell. now that i know, dont wonder why i dont tell anything to you much. i know you're also thinking negative things. yay. i love you. (: i wont pretend like i'm sad. cause i'm NOT. just disapointed, & hurt. (: its okay la. its just something u go through in your teenage life. right right right? pfft. ; i love my dad. i love my mum. i love my family. i love everyone. |