the little specs of light that gives hope.

with a soft sprinkle of lust

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Wednesday, June 25, 20087:26 AM

dedication : amir&yazid

i miss warriors, so much. i miss those happy times so much.

why yazid? why amir?

pls, the least i hope for is for u to understand right now.

i really wished that we'll be as close as ever.

i've done oh-so-much to avoid this till it got out of hand.

why cant u see that i really <3

you.eventho kiter tetap kawan, rasenyer laen okeh. its so much diff.

u guys are really different from those i know.

apart from akim,douglas,nurra.

like those 3Es, they're so much more diff au.

i nvr thought this can happen. i thought we'll be close long.

long enough for me to stay in this world. i feel so crashed.

i know its not 'bye'. but its a sign, right? if no, then why?

will we ever be back to normal? pls say yes. if yes, i shall wait.

if no, then i really dk what to do or even say.

i believe u guys think this is the best right?

then i shall trust u. haish. i dont get it, why cant u see?

i chose to hurt him more than you guys. i'd rather have that.

&with u guys doing this,it made me feel like i've done the biggest mistake ever.

i wished this june holiday never happened.

its so hard to accept the fact that u guys feel so far.

krg la mereka whom i look up to. u guys are those who make me smile.

akim,akai,douglas,nurra,fuad,amir,yazid,izzad.

one is not complete, i need all. u guys are like my puzzle u noe.

with one missing, its NEVER complete. pls amir, pls yazid..

i'm on bended knees, begging, pleading, so tt things will be back to norm ; all of us.

the 8 of us, the stars ; the families ; the warriors.

i thought, when things were settled, we'll be happily ever after.

but it seems like ; sadly ever after.

why sey gni? why u say this is the best thing to do?

u guys dont wanna hurt me anymore? what lame bullshit is this?!!!

doing this will just hurt me more. i noe for the fact tt nth comes easy.

theres always a rough patch we have to go thru. but why give up now..?

&&i admit, i did get hurt. at least being hurt like that is bearable.

but with this decision, NO. not at all. it hurts me more.

if u guys are really firm with this decision, fine. i really cant do anyth.

at least its not goodbye, i think. &i shall just let the good times roll.

i will miss em. but theyre just memories. nth more, nth less.

i can only replay it in my mind. not real life.

how i wish we could rewind back time, oh who am i to kid?

that can nvr happen. haish. fine guys. i shall let u decide.

thanks for the wonderful times.

to izzad : i noe u wont ever forgive me.

but once ur heart is opened,

pls tell me, msg me, call me,

whichever u feel is the best way to contact.

that is if u ever, & even kept my num which is = to no, right?

i noe u izzad, u'll delete my num.

u've deleted my num the moment this happened.

i'm sorry, i'm utterly sorry. saying sorry wont help,

but i'll at least try. thats the least i can even do. ):

forgive me, pls? ah, what am i thinking? this can nvr happen, i noe.

DOUGLAS, thx for helping, caring, and being there okay.

& i noe ur decision is NOT coming from ur heart yazid,amir.

u THINK its the best. cox ure afraid to hurt me, ever again.

but there's always another way out. i noe so, okay.

its whether u want to take it, or not. its up to u both.

'its gonna hurt when it heals too.

eventhough i really love u, i gotta smile cos i deserve to.

it'll all get better in time..'

; i thought i was stronger. i thought i could go thru whatever.

proven tt i'm not. i just let myself crash & burn.

why did i? ahh. i'm not sure myslelf.

LIKU-LIKU HIDUP.

i will survive baybeh! hoho.

at least i shall try my best.

softest part of my heart [warriors]

consisting of ; akim,amir,fuad,izzad,yazid,nurra,douglas.

the rest in sku, u guys can nvr hurt me. cox i pretty much dont care.

'i wish i could talk to u guys.

i wish i could try not to cry.'

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